Thursday, March 10, 2016

On Anonymous Profiles


Two years ago, I wrote a post in Facebook on the burden of being a newly married girl. It was not based on my experiences alone; I had adapted the tales shared by a few of my friends and what I saw in the lives of my aunts. However, for a reader, it looked like I was rambling and complaining about my new ‘status’.

My husband did not bother much. In fact, he did not care. (Maybe he just ignored the subtle signs or simply believed what I said “No, this is not about us, love”). The post got a good number of likes, and a reasonable number of comments, ranging from ‘well, said’ to ‘are you okay?’. My husband got phone calls from a few of his friends who felt his life was in shambles. My married friends probably rejoiced, (‘haha…welcome to the club), a few unmarried ones texted (“really, Jumi? Is this what marriage is about?”) 

I got a phone call from my mother in law, who tried to educate me about the different phases in life and the adjustments every human being has to go through. She did make sense. But I had too much of unhappiness nestled in my chest. I had hoped them, my new family and new set of friends, to acknowledge my wish to write and publish.

Slowly, I learned to confine my thoughts to my diary. I religiously penned down my feelings, opinions on movies and political incidents, things I longed to do, my frustrations and unforgettable moments. It gave me a sense of accomplishment. I went for morning walks and came back to the silence of my kitchen, my mind full of fresh air, lot of ideas and good lexes that I longed to write down and show to the world. But I had earned too many constraints. I would hurt many people and their sentiments.
 I was learning why women were forced to opt for fake names or profiles when they write.


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